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Help Save My Marriage And Avoid Divorce

by Rex Freiberger

Many married couples today are turning to marriage counselors and psychologists to help save their marriages. There is an obvious need for professional help. Divorce rates for first marriages are higher than they have ever been, and the divorce rate for second marriages is above the 70th percentile. Naturally, going to marriage counseling is one of the most common responses, and many counseling professionals specialize in helping couples avoid divorce.

Alcoholism, drug addiction, pornography addiction, and physical abuse mean that the marriage couple needs serious therapy and rehabilitation work. Whether one person has the problem or it is shared by both parties, the couple will need therapy. No matter how serious the couple is, they can not help save marriage by themselves. These problems are too serious to be dealt with by the couple alone.

'The Golden Rule' helps save many marriages. If you find yourself asking the question what to do to help save my marriage then you might want to try this exercise. It has already helped many couples from failing marriages. Many know 'The Golden Rule' from their childhood, being do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

We all want to be treated properly and your spouse is no different. Use this as a guiding principle when talking to your partner. Make sure you speak softly and calmly. Be pleasant to them even in simple things like greeting them nicely when they get home from work. Don't nag for things to get done - you can ask nicely and then maybe do it yourself. Remember that you're working on and saving your marriage and a little annoyance is a small price to pay.

When you married this person, you loved them with your whole heart, right? In truth, you still do. Unfortunately, all of the garbage of life has blown through and covered that up. The mess can be 'cleaned up'. You have the answer to the question, "How can I help save my marriage?" Love means putting the other person's feelings ahead of your own, and in time they will do the same.

Finally, don't say that you've already done everything that we have described in this article. There can be a lot of accumulated guilt and pain in a marriage, and that won't go away in an instant. You need to decide that you want to save you marriage, and then recognize that there is a lot of hard work ahead to fix the damage caused by a year's fighting. Working together with your spouse, you can say, "I did help save my marriage."

In the old days, 'til death do us part" had a binding meaning and no one went around asking how to save marriage. Seems like those days are over, and people often find themselves asking "How to save my marriage?" You can save your marriage through an array of resources available to those willing to work things out, without going to the extreme of divorce. You shouldn't decide to end your marriage just because it isn't as exciting as it once was. To avoid ending your marriage you must understand that you are making a permanent commitment and be confident enough to stay and work things out.

Published January 13th, 2008

Filed in Family

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